Remembering 911

Music at the Moment: Psapp - Hi

I remember 911 is that emergency number you have to call if your roomie lops off an arm or if there are 6 masked men with guns standing in your foyer looking at you as you turn on the light in search of a midnight drink of water.

Also, 911 is eerily mystical in nature. 9+1+1=11! And then if you add 1 and 1 you get 2 which added to 9 is 11!!! Consider also that if you add 911 to itself you get 1822. In November 1822, Luis Arguello became the first governor of California under Mexican rule! Luis! Louis! Louis Cypher! Lucifer! Even more uncanny is that the same trick with Lucifer's name was used in the 1987 movie Angel Heart which I must have seen 911 times!!

Further, 9 sounds like Nein which is German for No. 1 is also one that can represent a person. 1 is also won which is the past tense for being victorious or succeeding in a competition. Do you realize that this, loosely translated, means "No one won!?"

I'm fairly certain Kitty weighs 911 pounds.

When I was 9 I had a crush on an 11 year old. Together, he and I witnessed two 1-year-olds beat up a 9 year old. We tried to stop them by hurling the bricks we were playing with at them. I must have thrown 9 of those things, but my friend only threw 2 and hit each one of them squarely on the head. One of them had to have 526 stitches while the other had 385. That adds up to 911 stitches!

I had a breakfast bar this morning that was 90 calories. I remember having thought to myself, wow I could eat 11 of these. Gasp! Coincidence?

So, remember that the numbers 911 are very mysterious and you should always remember to never forget that it's good to always remember not forgetting to not forget what you should always remember to always never forget.

As I head out to my car adorned with it's 1,456 different "I support" ribbons, my Choose Life tag and my 50 or so ingeniously witty flag stickers, I shall get in and head proudly to Starbucks to order my Chai Latte which most likely has 911 calories per venti all while cursing liberals and talking on my cell phone.